When in a disagreement, most people will tend to concentrate on defending themselves and in so doing lash out at the other person. When by themselves, they will probably spend most of their time thinking about the negative aspects of the other person and every bad thing they have done in the past. But the more you concentrate on your innocence and their guilt, the more distorted the picture becomes, and it is more likely that you will misjudge their motives, and in turn reject their attempts at solving the problem.
In a small argument the biblical thing to do would be to overlook the trespass, and to not let the small things irritate us so badly. (Prov. 17:14, 19:11, 1 Peter 4:8) And often, when you deliberately focus on the positive influence that that person has, and on how hard they work, you will see how this certain reaction is one of not that many.
But sometimes that won't be the case. Not often, but sometimes. But at times when the other person is clearly in the wrong, a mediator is always very helpful. Just having someone impartial to either of you moderating the conversation will go a long ways. And remember, disputes are expensive. The longer they go on, the more the arguers are mentally and spiritually taxed. (Luke 6:27,Matt. 22:39) We are commanded to rejoice in the Lord always, but how can we rejoice when we are full of anger and strife?
Disputes and arguments will come to everyone. Christians and Atheists and everything in between will eventually have an opportunity to quarrel, but if we respond biblically, in adherence to His word, we will be able to praise the Lord more fully. And maybe bring someone to Christ in the process!
1 John 5:2 “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments.”
Now you need to go read Philippians 4:2-9.
Thanks for reading!
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